all new people.

she’s crying in the room next to me.  before she left she said she wanted to be alone tonight.  and while i can do that for her, the hope i’d been feeling last night drained away when she asked for that.  we decided today, well, i decided today that i couldn’t do poly right now.  that i’d been too scared, too toxic, too everything-not-right for so long that i just needed to step back.  and now she’s sad.  and i’m tired.  tired of running on the fumes of hope and history.  and now we work.  i work.  at proving us both wrong.